Guest Lecturing

As is more common than you might think, I recently got a phone call from Connie-an English instructor that also works as the teacher’s secretary in the school of foreign languages-asking me to give a speech. The subject of my speech was to be, well, pretty much anything. Now, maybe you don’t often get calls to give such speeches, but that’s because you’re not an American living in China (or if you are, you’ve given a few). Connie set me up with Robin, who turned out to be an English professor at our university. Robin had some of the ever important 关系(relations) with some administrators at another school in Changzhou. It’s apparently a much lower ranked school than ours (so really in the gutter) and its students “didn’t pass” the Chinese national college entrance exam. How you can’t pass a numerically scored test is beyond me. Because this school was so poor, they had no foreign teachers, but via Robin’s relationship and some partnership with our school, I would give a speech to the English and International Business students. The poor quality of this school compared to ours was continually stressed to me, which I kind of took to be like a scene in a movie where a guy from Alabama explains that Alabamians love to make fun of Mississippi because, as he sees it, Mississippi is the only state worse than Alabama.

(yes, that's me chugging with the university president-part of my "cultural expertise"...)

So I gave a speech featuring my take on American identity, which was just watered down but more difficult version of the one I gave when teaching the middle school students at the English training institute. The most notable feature of the speech was the incredible noise coming from the students. In the book Iron and Silk by Mark Salzman, he recalls a Chinese person’s answer to his question about why no one pays attention at speeches. The Chinese person explained that they have to sit through so many uninteresting and inconsequential speeches that they realize that listening is highly unproductive. I have dealt with this a bit, but this was by far the least attentive audience I have spoken to here (maybe that has something to do with their low test scores). I had added some more efficient (but more difficult) vocabulary to the speech I had given to the middle schoolers. When I broke off and checked with one of the more frequent interrupters, I realized that about half the class wasn’t following much of my speech at all (despite the PowerPoint with an outline and pictures). I had overestimated the English skills of these students that “didn’t pass” the entrance exam. Easily enough, I slowed my speech down to almost a slur and really, really explained it. Which was fine, because Robin and his colleagues were hoping I would speak for an hour and half. I more accurately evaluated the attention span of students being forced to attend a speech in a foreign language, and wrapped it up quickly.

Ending early was fine, as the question and answer session is always the more fun part of these speeches. After much prodding, the hands started to go up. I got the customary questions of how long have I been in China, do I like China, do I find Chinese women attractive, do I have a girlfriend (to which I can finally answer yes). I was a little taken aback when one male student stood up and said something like “You are the first foreigner I have ever talked to, it is more special because you are so handsome, will you give me a hug?” Albeit a bit awkward, I went over and gave him a big hug, to much applause. One girl who didn’t seem to quite get self-deprecating humor stood up and said: “You made some mistakes in your speech” to which I responded, “Oh, please share them with me” she continued: “You said you weren’t handsome and not too funny, but in fact you are very handsome and very humorous.”

<-(imagine getting a lecture from that guy) As I was giving my speech, I noticed that one man was actually paying pretty close attention. He was a sharp looking, tall, and very well built man. After the speech he introduced himself in broken but viable English as one of the P.E. teachers at the school (compulsory P.E. in college is one of the things I like about higher education here). He asked me by far the most interesting question and wanted to know my thoughts about what China learn from America to improve its educational system. Having absolutely no education training and pretty limited experience, I tried to make it clear to him that I could just give him my opinion. But, of course, in the great absurdity of my job, I am a certified “expert in the fields of culture and education” here in China. So, he would probably take what I said much too seriously. I focused on what I think my students most lack, critical thinking and creativity. Of course these two skills can only really be developed and harnessed in an open society, which China is definitely not, but I didn’t say that. It was also odd that he, but none of the English professors, who clearly understood the whole speech, had a question for me.

Overall, the thing that is most awkward about giving speeches like this is the respect and honor I receive, simply for being a Westerner. I recently wrote a whole post about this concept, but it’s just odd to be treated like a guest speaker. Unbeknownst to me, it was arranged for me to receive a handsome sum of money after the speech, which I was happy to give for free. While talking about the American identity, I was reminded of how proud we Americans are. I’m not sure that national pride is a wholly good or bad thing, but giving a presentation about America in China makes one think about it. When talking about America with Britons, Canadians, Spaniards, or the various other people I’ve been in contact with, I generally tone down some of my national pride; recognizing that American hegemony isn’t exactly popular or politically/morally acceptable to them. But, Chinese people have no problem hearing about America’s largeness. This is because I don’t know that the Chinese see America’s power and excess as a problem. Of course, the Chinese are very unhappy that China is not the richest and most powerful country in the world. But, they don’t seem to mind global dominance, but rather admire America and aspire to soon replace it. The default adjective I use for Chinese people is resilient, and I think it very appropriate. As a collective group and individually, the Chinese are also very ambitious. Very. Although they aren’t exactly forward with it, Chinese people kind of want to forget the half-millennium when Europe and then America really took off. They want to forget that, and especially the period between 1911-1978 and put China back in the position of one of the preeminent countries on the planet. I couldn’t be happier to have been born in America and am really aware of what a blessing it has been, but it’s kind of odd when I am the one that points out to a Chinese person that even America has its fair share of problems.