Closing the China chapter

The end is here. This will be my last blog about China. Phew. It was a great two years, full of challenges and fun. I am incredibly glad that I decided to go, and even happier that I stuck around for year two. Many people have stumbled on this blog because they have in interest in going over to the Middle Kingdom to live, teach, or maybe just travel. So, below is a Dave Lettermanesque list of reason to and not to head east. Now I just have to catch up on sharing about life in the tropics. Thanks again to all who read my blabber.

Top ten reasons to leave the States and teach English in China
1. Haircuts and shoe shines are so cheap you can always look dapper (if that’s your thing)
2. You’re such an outlier and it’s assumed you have money so you can wear pajama pants and an old t-shirt to fancy clubs (if that’s your thing)
3. Wonton soup delivery in January
4. The fact that even if you’re 22 it’s still totally cool to challenge the Communist Party Dean of your department to a baijiu shot contest
5. A twenty ounce bottle of Snow Beer only costs 1.9 yuan ($0.28)
6. A bachelor’s degree from any old American college or university catapults you to an upper middle class college professor
7. The opportunity to learn what one in every five humans thinks and does
8. The completely challenging and awesome experience of dealing with a writing system totally different from ours
9. Hard sleepers
10. Street vendor fried dumplings

And ten reasons you might want to pass on that ticket to Shanghai
1. Your clothes will get dirty almost anywhere you choose to sit down or rest your arm on, dust seems to cover everything, so you’ll just be dustily dapper
2. You’re such an outlier you will invariably get bugged to buy things, give money, and will hear incessant “Hellos” from everyone. Everyone.
3. No heat in most buildings in January. Or November, December, or February for that matter
4. Baijiu will give you a hangover like one you’ve never experienced before
5. Snow Beer tastes about as good as it costs. Getting good quality beer requires living in a big city and lots of cash money
6. Even though you’re upper middle class, you still have to breath the same dirty air, deal with the same horrendous traffic, smell the same dirty bathrooms (they’re almost all dirty), and deal with the same crowds
7. One out of every five people is Chinese. That means there are a whole hell of a lot of Chinese people. It can get overwhelming.
8. The completely befuddling Chinese writing system
9. Anytime hard and soft sleepers are sold out. Happens a lot. Can’t buy tickets more than 10 days in advance, can’t buy tickets directly on the Internet, can’t always get tickets unless you’re in the city of departure, etc.
10. At some point, you’ll trade 1,000 bowls of rice for just one loaf of wheat bread